Ode to the Bjorn Bouncer

By some miracle I found a bjorn bouncer on craigslist for $50. I e-mailed them Friday night about it hoping that it hadn't been snagged yet. Around 11 on Saturday I still hadn't gotten a response so I tried again. I got an e-mail back right away saying that they still had it and we could come get it. I was so excited we went and got it right away.

Now, I must make mention of the significance of this. I have done tons of research on this bouncer. I have read tons of great reviews, watched videos of kids using it, and basically scoured the internet for months trying to find one that wasn't full price.

Online, a new one retails for about $125. Fancier ones can be around $150+. In stores the only one I found was at Segals for $190. At prices that compare to what you'd spend on a crib or a stroller, I kind of figured it wasn't going to be something anyone would go for off of our registry. It's a bouncer for crying out loud!

These are the key reasons that I felt like it might be worth the extra cost:

• It grows with baby. It can be used from birth until baby is about 25-30 pounds.
• It doesn't have tons of stuff all over it. No music, no vibration, no crazy patterns, no toys (unless you add them).
• It adjusts so that baby is upright enough to see you if you plop her in it to get your hands free or it reclines if they fall asleep in it. 
• The cover is removable and washable. 
• The bouncing is good for arm and leg coordination and helps with balance and strength. 
• There are no belts, buckles, or snaps to manipulate when you put baby it. You just slide them right in and out of the harness.
• It's very compact. It collapses flat so you can store it easily and is lightweight and easy to carry around if you want to move it or travel with it. 

I've been scouring craigslist nearly every day for months looking for one. I've also been checking consignment shops here and there. Friday was the first time I'd seen one on craigslist since February. These things are hard to find!

So we jumped at the chance to get one. Coincidentally we went to visit our friends Zach & Sarah and their 3-month-old Amy right after we picked it up. I was so excited that Sarah let me test it out on Amy. She loved it. I probably sat and played with her in it for half an hour. After awhile she started to connect the wiggling to the bouncing and her arms and legs were going crazy. Now they want one too! It was really reassuring to have it kid and parent approved especially after so much hassle trying to find one.

I am so glad we found one used that we could afford and now I can't wait to stick Charlotte in it!

Here's some info on it if you are curious.
Official Website
Amazon

Non-Parent Activities

I went to great pains to keep this day open. It seems our weekends keep turning into a flurry of activities - visiting friends, baby showers, birthdays, holidays, grocery shopping etc... basically driving the four corners of Portland (Hillsboro, Vancouver, Greshem and Clackamas) and using up a tank of gas. So this Saturday I kept free of activities so we could drive to the beach.

Alas, you have eluded me again Mo's chowder!

It will be awhile before we can go to the beach again. At least as long as it takes for Charlotte to be able to go the drive without needing to be fed anyway, which means probably several months. I've been craving a good bowl of Moe's chowder anyway. As the week progressed and we got closer to today, I started to have my doubts about the "need" for this day trip. Gas is expensive, and we've been to the beach so many times that there really isn't much new to do. Really all we're going for is the food. That seems like a dumb reason to drive so far. Besides, I can't have beer at Rogue, I can't have any oyster shooters, and I can't walk much without being exhausted so a long walk on the sand is out and so it the outlet mall. We've done all these things several times anyway.

So the beach got vetoed.

Racking our brains for other ideas of things we could do today that would be special before the baby comes, we kept coming up short. One of the best things about being a young couple in Portland is that there are tons of fun things to do. There's farmers markets, the Saturday Market, festivals, all sorts of tastings of various delicious things, hiking trails, biking paths, museums, theaters, etc... You know, all the wonderfully "portland" things. But we couldn't come up with something we hadn't done already or that we could do since I'm so pregnant.

The city that keeps us busy. P-town for the win!

We've managed to explore basically what we've wanted to explore sans children. While I'm way annoyed that we don't have anything "special" to do today, I'm kind of relieved. We have explored our membership of this city and this region. We've driven up and down the Gorge, we've camped at the coast and in the woods, we've eaten and shopped and walked every inch of downtown, northwest, northeast and southeast Portland. We've gone to brewfest, rose festival, gay pride and cultural festivals, we've taken cooking classes. We've taken trips up to Seattle, we've gone swimming in rivers and lakes, we go to the sakery for fun events and tastings, we see movies at the McMenamins theaters. We've gone to the zoo and omsi, the japanese and chinese gardens, the art gallery and music concerts. We are ultimate Portlanders in all the ways we've wanted to be. Now that we have a baby on the way, I don't really feel as though there are things we'll have missed out on.

So, even though we're basically reverting to our usual weekend routine - grocery shopping, visiting friends, driving to the four corners of Portland again - I don't really feel that bad about it.  I guess the next chapter will be all about being parents in Portland. It will be about sharing our love of the things this city has to offer with our children and discovering new things that are more family oriented. We'll get to experience all of the things we love through a completely new lens and that's exciting!

Trying New Things

Yesterday I had cranio sacral therapy. This was quite an experience. Rather than a clinic, I drove to the address which turned out to be a house in the west hills out in the woods - it was very secluded. The house was all wood - wood walls, wood floors, wood ceiling - it felt like an unheated sauna. I had a view from the massage table of endless tall maple trees. It was like being at a retreat center. Rather than a young apprentice, my therapist was an experienced therapist that was there for a workshop about working on pregnant ladies. The lady holding the workshop stopped in to answer questions and offer advice throughout the therapy. At one point she asked if she could bring in another apprentice to feel the position of my baby, so I had three women feeling my belly, which I thought was fun. I like knowing where she is. The therapy was very relaxing and very light. I felt really good afterwards.

After my therapy session I went to the mall to buy a nursing bra. I also wanted to see if I could find a summer dress that could double for the choir concert next weekend and for my baby shower. After trying on nearly every dress in the store, I decided that nothing was really working for me so I just bought the bra. I've never bought a nursing bra before. It's a bit intimidating to need one to be honest.

It looked kind of like this in my dream,
but much bigger and it wasn't covered above.

I had a dream last night that instead of Andaluz, I ended up having to go to a different birth center. Rather than having rooms with tubs, this center had several hot springs areas (that didn't smell like sulfur) like what you see in Japan. I got confused about where I was supposed to go so I ended up having the baby right before I found the springs I was supposed to use. This was surprisingly insignificant. Since I was already there, I decided we should just swim in the water together. Then everyone else showed up - family, midwives, friends - and we had a barbecue on the patio while people swam in the spring. There was some confusion about who was supposed to bring what food and there was some sort of competition about which barbecue food was better. Even the baby was swimming. Not sure what this all means, but I found it kind of interesting.

Don't drop the baby!

I think the baby dropped yesterday. This is also called lightening. It's when the baby's head sort of wedges into the opening of your pelvis to get ready for birth. Now is about when it's supposed to happen, but I haven't read about it in awhile so I wasn't expecting it.
I don't know for sure that it actually has happened, but my pelvis felt like I had sprained it and the top of my tummy feels extra pulled down. Before I could kind of choose not to waddle if I wanted to, now I don't have much choice. It made for some very difficult moving yesterday. The only time I didn't feel it hurting was during water aerobics.

Sleep is becoming more of a challenge. Normally I wake up 3 or 4 times a night to roll over from side to side. This is quite the ordeal. I have a body pillow that I wedge under my belly and between my legs. I usually hug it too. It's the only way I can sleep comfortably at all. When I roll over, the whole pillow has to go with me. This means I have to wake up enough to lift the blankets up, roll on my back, pull the pillow to my other side, and then roll on top of it. The sheets come up off the corners of the bed pretty much every night. Lately I've been having to do this more often and it takes more consciousness so it takes longer to go back to sleep. Perhaps this is preparation for the future?

I feel like we're in the home stretch now. Tonight is our last birth class. Next week prenatal appointments start happening weekly. The weekend after next is my birthday, the following weekend is our shower, the week after that is the last week of school (and thus my last week of teaching voice lessons) and then we hit the waiting game. My midwife suggested making plans with people right up until and even after the "due realm" so that I have things to distract me from the lack of labor I'm having. So... anybody want to make plans in June?

Batting Down that Hatches

Today is 35 weeks and 5 days. I have about 6 stretch mark spots on my tummy :( but at least they're all still small.

This last week I met the pediatrician I mentioned in previous posts. I really like him and the more I've read and researched on the topic of vaccines the more I agree with his plan. I've felt so lucky to have midwives that respect my choices and agree with my ideals on a fundamental basis. I never have to question their expertise or actions. I feel like that sort of relationship will continue with this doctor. I told him at my appointment that it gets really exhausting having to research and triple check every decision I make with regards to healthcare and it would be nice to be able to just trust the judgement of an expert.

 The clinic also does a small group class for any new parents that want to learn and ask questions. I'm glad to have a resource like this. It also occurred to me how little I'll have to do after the baby comes. Right now we have weekly birth classes, prenatal appointments, water aerobics, I have 3 days a week of teaching voice lessons, and we drive all over creation for various visits and obligations on the weekends. Our lives are building up to this big monumental moment and then once it happens, nothing. No classes, no students, no aerobics. It's a blank slate. Which is good because I have no idea what to expect in terms of my exhaustion levels and what I'll need time for when the baby comes. But I like to keep busy and at least I have this one class to look forward to.

I had a dream last night that I got to the birth center because I had gone into labor, but I wasn't having any contractions. I kept telling everyone that it wasn't time yet and I wanted to go home, but my midwife said I was fully dilated and that the baby was coming any moment and I had to stay. She told me to rest and then left saying she'd come back when I was ready to deliver. I tried to sleep but family kept coming in our room and everyone was talking and waiting impatiently telling me I just had to do this or that and she would come. I felt out of control. I tried calling the midwife to come back but there was no answer. At one point the receptionist told me I needed to be less sarcastic because I was upsetting other people at the center. I was like..."what about all these people in my room making all this noise and upsetting me?!"I woke up before the baby came.

I feel pretty ready to have this kid, but apparently my subconscious isn't so sure! I guess it's a good thing I have another month.

Mental Preparation

Tonight our birth class didn't go quite as expected. The midwife that teaches it (our midwife) got called to a birth so she couldn't make it. She had invited a couple to tell their birth story so the whole class was basically just that. It was a really interesting birth story, and both parents were really engaging. It was cool to ask them questions and to hear all the details of what they experienced.

I've noticed a pattern with the birth stories I've heard and read so far. Nothing goes how it's supposed to. What we've learned in our class and what I've gathered from reading and such is the following:
- first babies usually come an average of a week late, so expect that
- your water may or may not break before you go into labor - 1 in 10 breaks first, most break during, some don't break at all
- contractions start mild and far apart and gradually increase in intensity and frequency
- your cervix dilates slowly for the first 4-6 centimeters and then goes to 10cm pretty quickly

So far, none of these things have been terribly consistent other than that first babies come late. The only ones that haven't come late are ones that have been delivered through c-section. This tells me I need to be patient. I don't want to be, but I need to be.

I've heard more than one story about how contractions were erratic and hard to time. I've also heard that they can increase and then stop altogether for awhile. I've heard people say that they weren't that painful and felt more like increased pressure and people say they were horribly painful, but bearable. Some peoples labors came on quickly, some took hours and hours. What I've learned from all this is that there's no way at all to predict how my labor will go.

At this point I feel very at peace with the whole prospect. I've started to let go of the control I wanted. For instance, I've had it in my head that I don't want to make very much noise, but the more I think about how I cope with pain, the more I realize that I will probably be rather noisy and that's really okay. There's no use in setting a mental expectation on myself.

I have a feeling of resolution. I know birth is unpredictable, I know it's probably not going to feel good, I also know that it won't be easy. But I'm going to do it, and I will do it and I will never regret that I chose to do it this way. That I am absolutely unfalteringly sure of. It's the same sort of resolution I've felt in the past when I've decided to take control of my diet or when I started grad school. I knew I would get through it and succeed no matter what. I just knew.

I think it really helps that I completely trust my midwives and that I feel totally at ease at the birth center. Having classes and prenatal appointments in the rooms where I will have my baby with the women that will help me do it has really helped me visualize and mentally prepare. It's like when I had to learn not to be nervous for singing. If I spent time in the singing space and pictured my performance going well there I was always more comfortable. This is a different performance obviously, but I feel confident about it just the same.

As this baby's debut becomes more impending, I feel like I'm getting more and more comfortable with this whole thing. I feel really lucky to have stumbled onto this path somehow. I wish I could somehow convince everyone I know that this opportunity exists for them, but I know that every woman has to make her own decisions and find peace with it and perhaps those choices are as widely variant as the birth experiences themselves.

Adventures in Pre-Parenting

Starring, yours truly and Paul.

Today the weather was all nice so I thought it would be a good idea to get some outside activities done. We cleaned out the element (I had spilled cereal all over so this was good practice) and then decided to try to get the car seat installed and to put the stroller together. Well, I decided. So while Paul was moving the board games out of our closet and into our garage, I was very slowly shoving the giant box of stroller across the parking lot. I was mostly just amusing myself when the neighbor lady pulled in to the parking lot and told me I shouldn't be lifting anything. I told her I wasn't lifting, just shoving, but she insisted on helping me. The hilarity of this is that she's probably in her seventies and refused to let me help at all. I wish I had a picture!

Paul carried the box up on to the sidewalk and we pulled everything out. He started to put the car seat base in while I separated all of the other pieces when I found that one of the wheels had punctured a hole all the way through the seat of the stroller. So then we packed it all back into the box as best we could and drove to a couple of babies'r'us stores to exchange it (the first didn't have the same color).

Then we got home and started all over again. No hole this time thankfully! I was so amused at our preparing to be parents activity that I felt the need to take pictures. It didn't really occur to me to take a picture of the finished stroller, but you get the idea.

The car seat correctly installed! See how the green matches the car?

Front wheel installation. 

Bailey had to help too.