39 weeks, 2 days

I woke up this morning after a good night's sleep and I feel like I have a new lease on life.

*tmi warning*

I had a really good pee after I got up. This is a significant event when you're pregnant. I usually have to pee every couple of hours and it feels like I drank 3 beers and a glass of water whenever I have to go, but then it ends up being barely a trickle. Having a good pee is probably one of the most satisfying things that can happen to me right now!

*tmi warning over*

Anyway, yes, I'm still pretty uncomfortable, and yes I really want this baby out. But today feels like a good day. I decided that as long as I still had at least two weeks to kill I would spend them doing things I didn't think I had time to do.

The first thing is more reading. I went to Powell's on Tuesday and picked up two fabulous books. The first is "Husband Coached Childbirth" written by Dr. Robert Bradley. He's the doctor that created the Bradley method of natural childbirth. This is one of the two most popular kinds of methods of natural birth, the second being hypnobirthing. You can take classes for either of these methods. I suck at meditation and I didn't want to put that much pressure on Paul to coach me so I just figured I'd stick to what we'd learned in our birth classes, but more learning never hurts right? I am so glad I got this book. Already I've learned a set of simple exercises that I can do that will help with the hip pain and swollen ankles I have already. It would have been nice if I'd been doing them weeks ago! I'm making Paul read it too. This is an absolute MUST if you are even considering an unmedicated birth.

The second book is "The Baby Book" by Dr William Sears and his wife Martha. This was sitting on the coffee table at the birth center before one of my appointments and I started thumbing through it and was sold. It has literally everything you ever wanted or needed to know about what to do with a baby. I was skimming through it yesterday when I read that you don't want to leave your baby swaddled tightly for long periods of time because it hinders the development of their hips since they can't kick their legs. I was prepared to be a swaddling pro since it's suppose to help with colic and had never heard this before. I'm really glad I read it now! Every time I pick it up I learn something new and significant.

By the end of the day today I'll probably get the last scarf finished. I've decided this is the thing that the baby's waiting for. She's considerate like that. I just have to wrap them and they'll be ready to go. I'm also going to spend some time on the baby book. I wrote a good amount of stuff in it when I bought it, but haven't really added much to it since. I'll probably put in the gift list from the shower and put in some pictures since I won't really want to do it later.

With all this stuff to preoccupy me, and because I'm having a good morning, I'm feeling pretty good about the wait ahead of me. Perhaps not being stressed about it is just the thing that my body needs to do its thing! *fingers crossed*

39 Weeks & So Over It

Well, today marks 39 weeks, and I knew it would get more and more uncomfortable but couldn't have predicted it would be like this. I assumed that I'd get to this point and just be eager to reach the finish line because I'd been waiting for it so long. But it's a bit more complex than that. A mix of physical discomfort, emotional distress, and the unpredictability of the future has me basically disabled right now.

First off, I'm super big so I only have a few things left that I can wear that cover my giant belly. I've taken to stealing Paul's t-shirts. What's most frustrating is that I manage to spill something on my front nearly every time I eat and with a limited wardrobe I can't really change my clothes that often. I get so angry when I spill on myself! My feet are swollen so my shoes don't fit so I'm limited to flip-flops. Bad shoes + swollen ankles = sore feet = sore hips = cranky me.

The weight of the dropped baby is entirely on my right hip. I can only walk about 10 minutes before I'm in pain. I didn't realize how much walking around stores by myself recharges me. Since I can't really walk, I've been missing out on my alone time and thus haven't been coping with added stress well. Since I don't have my coping system, I end up getting really moody or crying all over Paul.

Sunday night we went to get Cold Stone to help me feel better. I hadn't left the house all day so I thought the combo of sugar and getting out might help. Because my swollen ankles, dripping ice cream on my shirt, and the feeling of exhaustion I was nearly in tears by the time we got home so I decided to sit in our bed with my feet propped up. I ended up pulling one of the tendons that supports the uterus causing a huge amount of pain. My arms were shaky from trying to support my weight as I tried to get comfortable and I just burst into tears. Crying makes it worse because I can't breathe and end up hyperventilating. Paul rubbed my feet and got me water. I can't imagine this without him.

The threat of the future has me rather worried and scared as well. I'm not even worried about being a new parent. Honestly that's the thing I'm looking forward to most. What has me scared is the lack of two incomes for the next couple of months combined with our lease being up the end of August. I don't know how we're going to afford to move yet again, and as much as I love our apartment, we really can't afford to stay here. I started looking at some future living possibilities and applying to jobs that I may be able to do without having to put our baby in daycare. Still, having such huge factors unsettled has me losing sleep and feeling helpless to do anything about it.

It seems the one thing that best relief would be for me to get this baby out. I don't blame her for avoiding the outside world when it seems to be causing so much stress to her warm cushioned environment. I have a massage this afternoon. Maybe I can find a happy place so she'll be more inclined to come out!

Adventures in Nesting

Well, the urge to "nest" has been as active as ever this last week. I've been trying to figure out things to keep me preoccupied so that I'm not bored to death waiting to go into labor.

In spite of my willingness to get things done, I'm rather limited. Since the baby's dropped my hips have spread more making it difficult to walk or stand more than a few minutes. Actually, it's almost unbearable to walk very far or to get up from sitting. So my projects are done in short bursts or I have to figure out how to do them while sitting.


At the top of my project list is knitting presents for my midwives and their apprentices. I finished the blue one yesterday. Knitting is about the only thing I can do for a prolonged period of time so I'm glad I have some projects to keep my busy. The hard part is blocking them when they're done because I have to crawl around on my hands and knees to pin them down and steam them.


The day before yesterday I scrubbed the bathtub and washed the shower curtain. It's rather difficult to lean over the edge of the tub with such a huge belly. I got a book awhile ago by Mrs. Meyer that has all sorts of cleaning tips in it. It suggested putting the shower curtain and the liner in the washer and then air drying the plastic liner while the curtain dries in the dryer. I was so surprised at how well it worked to get the plastic liner clean. The maintenance guy also brought me a new curtain rod and installed the diaper washing thing on our toilet. So that crossed three things off my list.

Today I transplanted the mint and lavender plant that Bri got me for mothers day into a bigger pot. It ended up taking a lot more effort than I had expected. Mint has pretty tough roots! You can see it needed to be in a bigger pot as my window sill wasn't quite big enough anymore. I also planted some sweet thai basil since regular basil doesn't seem to be in season yet. I'll add it to the pot when I can get it.


One of the big projects on the list was to fix our barbecue. We haven't been terribly nice to it and one of the burners decided to shoot flames out the front and melt the knob off. This was a Paul project for the most part. Once he got the burner fixed and had disassembled most of the barbecue I came out with a big bowl of soapy water, some rubber gloves, and steel wool. It's amazing how dirty barbecues get!



Paul hooked the hose up to the faucet around the side of the building and we got it mostly clean, and now I have the hose to water my plants. Yay!


I also managed to get a drawer cleared for bottles and such. Paul did the dishes this morning while I cooked whole wheat banana walnut pancakes with blueberries. We know how to suffer around here.

Still left on my to do list is to shampoo the couch, to dust and to clean out the fridge. Hopefully my hips will let me get everything done over the next few days without killing me first!

38 weeks 1 day: Mad Dash to Labor

So, I know I still have two weeks before my due date. But I'm horribly uncomfortable (as I was forewarned) and I would really not mind if our baby wanted to come a little early. Actually, I wake up in the morning thinking "this could be the day I go into labor" It's still early so I'm not too discouraged yet, but I'm not going to accept this level of discomfort without a fight! So I've compiled a list of ways to naturally induce labor followed by what I've tried. Sorry if some of this is tmi.

Signs of Labor so far:

•  a few braxton hicks contractions (my belly gets really hard), but nothing of note
• my pelvis has been aching which is a sign that she's dropped more, my belly is also noticeably lower and I feel my center of gravity and my weight lower - it's heavy

Methods to Naturally Induce Labor:

1. Sex - prostaglandins in semen help soften the cervix to stimulate dilation. 
• no comment
2. Nipple Stimulation - triggers production of oxytocin, the hormone released to cause contractions
• I figured out how to use my breast pump today. I feel dirty. 
3. Stripping the membranes - is when a doctor or midwife sweeps their finger around the cervical opening to loosen the amniotic sac from the uterine wall
• my birth center doesn't do this and it's horribly painful. pass.
4. Red raspberry leaf tea - stimulates uterine contractions, although not very strong ones
• been drinking a few cups a day it for a couple weeks now, although today and yesterday I didn't because I need to make more. it's surprisingly delicious.
5. Evening Primrose Oil - is an omega-6 fatty acid oil that helps soften the cervix to allow for dilation. my midwife recommends 2 pills orally from 36 weeks and one internally at 38 weeks. I'm not going to elaborate.
• been doing this since 36 weeks.
6. Walking/Exercise - may help the baby drop into position better
• I've been walking a bit every day - mostly for shopping, but it's still hard! Yesterday I really pushed myself at water aerobics. This may be part of what helped her drop more. 
7. Pineapple, Eggplant Parmesan and Spicy Foods - I think these are more wives tales, but they're supposed to stimulate labor.
• today I ate a really spicy burrito. I have pineapple plans tomorrow. It may not do anything, but at least I really like pineapple. 
8. Accupressure - the trigger points are in the shoulders, the back of the ankles and the webbing between the thumb and index finger
• My massage therapist was kind enough yesterday to focus on these places (she has a three-month-old, she feels for me) I'm pretty sure this is probably what caused her to drop more. 
9. Black/Blue Cohash - it's mostly for if you've been in labor for awhile and the contractions are still irregular. it's supposed to cause them to go into a rhythm and get more productive.
• probably won't use this at all and if I do it will be after my due date at the instruction of my midwife. this stuff is potent!
10. Castor Oil - is supposed to induce labor, but also cleans you out of everything. I've heard it's rather unpleasant. I hope I don't get to a point where this becomes necessary.
• If I do this it won't be until after my due date.
11. Swinging on a swing - gravity?
• I was going to try this today just because it sounded amusing, but didn't get to it. 

The saga continues. 

The Baby Shower

As probably everyone who reads this know, Saturday was our baby shower and I am so happy with how it all went. I highly recommend doing the coed thing. It was so great to get to see all of our friends and family.

I can't get over how generous everyone has been. Short of diapers and a couple other odds and ends, we basically have everything we need - at least I think we do. It's hard to really know what you'll need until you get there I suppose. I went on a shopping trip yesterday and got a few more necessities like baby wipes, g diapers, and a moby wrap. I feel so relieved that we are going to be okay!

I have decided that we will have the best dressed baby ever. I ran some laundry and put all of her clothes away yesterday. I think we'll probably have a new outfit for her for every day until she stops fitting in the 3 month sizes. I'm glad we have the closet space, but finding homes for everything is a bit of a challenge. Our kitchen is pretty much at capacity, so all the bottles and parts are patiently waiting on the counter for a permanent home.

Tomorrow I'll be 38 weeks. There's very little that doesn't remind me of the fact. The warm weather over the weekend had my hands and feet so swollen that I felt like the marshmallow man. My energy is super limited. I'm actually dreading the walk from my car to the choir room to teach voice lessons this afternoon. It's also becoming even more difficult to roll over when I sleep, and to get up. Basically everything is hard. I have a list of things I want to get done around our house this week that's only about 10 items and yet it will likely take me the entire week because I'm so slow and have to rest all the time. I was promised supernatural mommy nesting powers and they haven't kicked in!  I feel the urge to get everything ready but I can't do it all myself. It's like being a little kid again and not being able to reach things or lift the milk jug.

After Wednesday I am basically in baby waiting mode. If anyone wants to come keep me company to help distract me from the contractions I'm not having I would love it! Honestly just having someone around to watch tv with is nice when you can't do much. So call me!

First Signs

Signs of impending doom:

• I keep feeling like I'm having menstrual cramps. They're mostly ignorable and not very predictable though so that's good.
• At my prenatal appointment yesterday they said that the baby had dropped, which would explain the cramping. 
• Acid reflux that I've not had before bordering on nausea. Sugar seems to be my enemy. 
• Birth center bag is packed and ready to go. We still need to have the car seat checked to make sure it's installed right. 

I've been having a combo of cramps and Braxton Hicks for about 3 consecutive days now. It's really weird to be in such a state of dread and anticipation at the same time. I keep telling her we just have to get through our baby shower tomorrow and then she can do what she wants.

I'm super excited to see everyone and am really happy about the weather predictions! I am so glad that I don't have to be more pregnant in hotter weather. This is about as warm as I think I want to handle.

Contemplations at 37 Weeks

Today can be measured in many ways. Today I'm 37 weeks and 1 day pregnant. Today I'm 40 pounds heavier than I was 9 months ago. Today, I woke up at 6 without an alarm.

Parenthood is on the brink! When we decided to get pregnant it was kind of an "all or nothing" attitude for me. We either have kids or we don't. There's really no alternative. Now that I'm at term and I could go into labor at any time it's difficult to really comprehend our "all in" decision. I suppose I've had 9 months to wrap my head around the idea. I'm in awe of how having a baby can change your life so completely and yet, people do it every day.

I think what baffles me is how instantly your life changes. We'll go from being "just the two of us" to "just the three of us." We'll have to have babysitters if we want to go out. We won't be getting sleep for weeks. We'll have a person in our lives that will dictate everything we do until the day we die. For as many dreams as I've had about it and as much as I've thought about it, I know I can't wrap my head around what all of this really means, and so I've decided to just accept each day as it comes and to stop trying to comprehend it all. It just is what it is.

I think pregnancy has treated me well. Given I've had my share of ailments such as frequent trips to the bathroom and sore hips, but there are perks to being pregnant that I'm going to miss. I think what I'll miss most is the attention.
Everyone always has something to talk to you about and everyone always wants to know what it's like. I thought I would get annoyed at being questioned all the time but I actually enjoy it. Random strangers smile at you, people get out of your way when you walk by. Old ladies try to help you carry large heavy items.

I also thought that I would be freaked out by people wanting to touch my belly but it's been the opposite the whole time. I love when other people get to feel the baby move. It's like a really great secret that I get to share with other people.
I will also miss the freedom to eat without guilt. I don't think I've been completely irresponsible about my diet through this whole thing, but I definitely haven't been tracking my calories, and I would never get away with some of what I've eaten without gaining a massive amount of weight. It does feel good to be in charge of my eating habits and to have the health and energy that comes with it, but I'm not looking forward to being back on the wagon of weight loss.

I've been having braxton hicks contractions for days now. It kind of sank in a couple days ago that these fake contractions could be the real thing at any time. That sort of blew my mind.

I'd like to survive past this weekend for the baby shower, and hopefully through next week too since I still have several voice lessons to teach. I've been working on knitting presents for my midwives to say thank you for how awesome they have been. I'm hoping this is something that keeps me from growing impatient as my due date approaches since I probably won't have time to finish them after the baby comes. I haven't quite finished packing the bag for the birth center yet either, so I probably need to get that done asap. I also feel like I haven't quite nested yet. I haven't had the spurt of energy I need to tackle the few projects around the house that I wanted to have done. It feels like I'll reach a place of resolution and then she'll just know and be ready to debut. But that could just be wishful thinking!