Monday, July 30, 2012

Pre Potty Training

I'm always finding myself in this limbo state with parenting where I feel like I'm either completely incompetent or a total over-achiever. I remember this one time I got a job at a call center and had to go through some rounds of testing so they could keep records of my skill levels. I took a typing test where I had recorded my score and then improved upon it. I told the lady administering the tests that I had improved on my score and I wasn't sure if they'd want to record it. She told me I didn't need to be a showboat. This has always bothered me. 

On one hand, yeah, perhaps I should learn better not to get cocky. On the other hand, this was a rather remedial job and I thought at the time that perhaps I should put myself out there in case there was some chance that they'd want to put me in a job that was more suitable to my skill level. I ended up quitting after two weeks! 

This is the sort of tension I feel with parenting. I'm exceedingly proud of Charlotte and how engaging and intelligent she is. I'm happy to get compliments and I love that people enjoy her. But I feel like I'm always trying to downplay what I like about her to keep from being obnoxious. And then there are times when she's returned to me by strangers because she's wandered off without my noticing. 

Lately I've been contemplating potty training and I keep going back and forth with whether I should even be thinking about it or not. Charlotte is only 13 months old. I am well aware that she is not ready. However she is rather smart, and the reality is that she's very far developed for a 13-month-old. From what I've gathered so far, these are the skills that will make potty training successful:

  1. the ability to signal when she needs to use the toilet - verbally or with a sign
  2. the ability to understand what I mean when I ask if she has to go
  3. the ability to recognize when she's being rewarded
  4. the ability to do the motor functions - pulling her pants up and down, ripping off toilet paper, holding her hands under the water faucet

Right now she can just barely do the first thing, and we're still working on her knowing what "poop poop" actually is rather than mimicking it when I say it.  I keep having this sneaking suspicion that there are things I could be doing now with her though. 

What I've found with many of the articles and blogs I've read is that potty training is a nuisance for parents and a traumatic experience for the kid. Everything starts out with "are you ready?" as in, "brace yourself, this is going to seriously suck." My gut has been telling me that it doesn't have to be that way. I'm actually rather eager to get started.

A few days ago I read this blog and so many of the things I was doing intuitively were put into words! It suggests associating a word or phrase with bowel movements (we have already been saying "poop poop"), letting your baby watch you use the bathroom (she follows me into the bathroom whether I want her to or not), having a potty or potty seat around before you start to use it, having your baby sit in the potty or potty seat when they go if you happen to catch them, and having your baby go diaper free. It also gives a great explanation for why to do these five things and how they will help later on. 

We still have a few months yet before we're ready to start hard core potty training. But I think it can be a far more casual and gradual experience than what so many "experts" would lead you to believe. And perhaps I'm being overzealous, and sure it would be cool to say that my child was out of diapers before 2 years old, but I'm not trying to win any awards here. I'm just really looking forward to when I don't have to change diapers anymore!

No comments:

Post a Comment